Acronymns

Due in large part (I understand) to the nearly illiterate communications skills of Paris Hilton (someone called her "Perez" Hilton in an email to me the other day...as in Simon Perez? Scarey), many young people, on the MySpace, Facebook and Twitter sites call many people their "BFF"s. This ostensibly means "Best Friend Forever". While an endearing term (in the moment, anyway), logically speaking, this condition is both probably and literally impossible.

By now I am certain that everyone knows the embarrassing and scandalous plight of Sen. John Ensign (R-NV), a now-disgraced member of congress who was, while for sometime being separated from his wife, had an long running affair with an employee, who was the wife of another employee... and also during that same time employeed the woman's 19 year-old son as a policy "consultant", all of this done with public funds and while he was an elected representative of the people of Nevada. The Senator can truly multi-task.

Senator Ensign is a member of the extremely conservative Four Square pentecostal church, a sworn member of Promise Keepers ("marriage is sacred and sancrosanct")and has (as we now can know) loudly and hypocritically protested the "immoral" and "despicable" behaviors of Bill Clinton and Sens. Craig and Vitter (Bill Maher has pointed out that during his campaign, the Senator refused to be alone in a car with another woman [not his wife], for appearance sakes, but apparently being "in" another woman without a car was acceptable behavior. Go figure) . He "came out" only after the husband of the "in flagrante" woman in question threatened both public exposure and extortion. The Senator has betrayed himself, his church, his matrimonial fraternity, his wife and his constituents.

In my book (Face,Place, Space or otherwise) this makes Sen. Ensign a "MMF", or "Miserable MotherFu@#er", of which he is quite literally both.

Vindications of the Senator are no doubt about to be forthcoming from Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly, and "MMF" works well in the abbreviated text of Twitter.

Have a nice day... with your neighbor's wife.