Monday, October 20, 2008

And Then the Mail Came

I previewed "Will somebody turn that damn thing off?" (next post below) for my friend RonnottheReaganOne (somewhere not in Texas), I got this back in the mail:


Is this the next post to your blog? I like it and agree. the sun has set on the good old USA--the credit card and car/boat loan mess is the next shoe to fall and it will land loudly.

I shared with my daughter Soros' notion that the age of consumption is over and that we will need to devote all resources to maintaining the existence of our species. Her reply was that we had been doing exactly that for most of our time as a species. Touche. Nothing new here to her mind.


Note from ed. By "car/boat loan mess" Ron doesn't mean just Hummers and yachts. It will also include all of those miserable little Hyundais being sold on every street corner and lots of flat-bottomed bassfishing boats that are sold on late-night TV. They were all sold sub-prime to people with mortgages from Fannie Mae. If you want to know what Soros said, I could tell you, but then you'd have to kill me.

Not being the one not to have the last word, I wrote this:

Yes, it is posted. Most of my teary eyed, overly devoted and naively optimistic Obama supporters will probably not speak to me again for weeks..or at least until after the election. Most have already scorned me for being a Doubting Thomas anyway. "That One" is not the Messiah and "That Older One' not only has a cancer but is one...and I am still not friend.

I was going to attempt to hold my breath until after the election, but that seems a little too masochistic and a waste of valuable energy when I could be typing something that might be incendiary, instead. Please send matches and kindling.

My son just voted early in Texas, and when he couldn't vote democrat he voted "libbie", as he calls it. He is more resourceful than I thought. Your daughter, it sounds like, has joined the choir we have been preaching to?

I have been invited to a costume party for Halloween. I think I will go in whiteface, as Colin "Uncle Tom" Powell. He must be a born-again type: he manages to say something to publicly "save"himself and try to make everyone think his past sins have all been washed away, every chance he gets. He is a Blackwaterhawk in virgin wool clothing. Or perhaps he is Tom Sawyer, hoping we will all whitewash his old fence? I wish he would go beat his feet on the Mississippi mud.

Re: On Bush buying 100,00 acres in Paraguay and what it might mean....

Not to worry:
The elder Bush will die soon. His lying no-tax lips will be sealed with CIA tape.
His ugly wife will soon follow, dead from terminal arrogance.
W will start drinking again (if he hasn't already) and his liver will fail and Laura will die from lung cancer ( all those cigarettes that the public is not supposed to know that she smokes).
Rove will be killed by an angry local tribal politician who loses a local election after taking Rove's advice.
Scooter Libby will become the regional Attorney General and declare Billy Graham the Archbishop of Latin America. The vatican will be pissed.
Cheney's heart will stop...again... after his lesbian daughter becomes pregnant...again... He will be too far from Walter Reed to get help.
The Saudis will then build a second Dubai paradise in the Paraguyan forest in order to lay claim to all the water (to replace the oil) which they will sell to the Chinese (to make won-ton soup) who will have invaded Canada by that time, because even they could not control the bitter red-neck American truck drivers with guns who will be patrolling the interstate highways, looking for nigger lovers to shoot, after Obama won the election. The 700 Club will only have 700 members left and Jerry Falwell will be the Secretary of Defense. Rush Limbaugh will be Whitehouse press secretary, and all of the foreclosed former homeowners who financed subprime will be given the old FEMA trailers to live in. Most of the Middle East will be glass: Israel will nuke Iran and Russia will nuke Israel and the UAE will all be back to riding camels for awhile The world will be a lovely place, and both Cuba and Serbia will be open to tourist trade.

I will be vacationing on beachfront property in Arizona that I bought from John McCain.


Life goes on in Texas.

2 comments:

Hillcountryrambler said...

This is a brilliant column! Unlike writers for the "legitimate" press, and talkers for the electronic media, you feel no need to censor either your thoughts, feelings of language. Bully! You are a sharp knife cutting through the thickening fog.

Ivan said...

HCR: Thanks very much. Someone asked the other day if I shouldn't be worried about being more "politically correct". I have come to the conclusion that you cannot be political and correct at the same time.

I'll send your fan club button out next week.....